An excerpt from National Lampoon The Saddam Dump in bookstores NOW! – plus bonus material not found anywhere else.

Tuesday, April 04, 2006

WHERE THE WMD AT

Daily Trial Entry:
I am getting tired of being asked: “Hey, Saddam Where are the WMDs?” What did Bush think he would find? -- a giant steaming vat of glowing green ooze waiting for him in a warehouse in Falluja.

No, it doesn’t work that way. You spread it around. A small vile of anthrax strong enough to take out a city… you put it everywhere. It’s in Akmed’s house and Fareed’s house, it’s in spray canisters and bike tires. I sent a batch Fed X to Cleveland. It’s like hiding the contents of a couple of pixie sticks from your little brother. Biological is so easy. I could never believe Bush actually thought he would find these.

The missiles? Right in front of your nose: they hold up bridges, they are the large flagpoles, pillars in my palaces, and the minarets in our mosques.

The chemical weapons are in thermoses at our 99cent stores, in urns of our dead soldiers, and in all Walmart vases. It’s really that easy.


STRENGTH IS POWER


comments

Hey, where’s my $20,000?! I blew myself up, and my family is still waiting to collect--Akmed Pala, Palestinian Suicide Bomber, 7th Level of Hell

Posted by: Notta_limb_onme77

3 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hey, where’s my $20,000?! I blew myself up, and my family is still waiting to collect--Akmed Pala, Palestinian Suicide Bomber, 7th Level of Hell

9:57 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

i like suicide bombers only if they kill or let me reframe that reales the right people and spare the enicent. i wish i had a couple of suicide bombers on my team and i would order them to kill the corupted americans that are keeping me away from my child. my birthdate is 9-11 and my name means the lord the light the sun. i wish i did have the power to kill off the people who are playing games with me i hate these people and i will pray and asked god to kill everone of them i mean relese because kill is such a harsh word. i hate corupt americans the world would be a better place if we kill i mean realese them to god using any means nessacary. leave him alone becaues you dont no wjhat those people did to him to make him feel that way peace

12:34 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

no more turning the other cheak its time to kill and die tring im coming as a light

12:37 AM  

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