An excerpt from National Lampoon The Saddam Dump in bookstores NOW! – plus bonus material not found anywhere else.

Tuesday, July 18, 2006


I have been hearing news of a World War Three (or Two And A Half depending on how you count it). I feel like Roger Clemens pitching in the minors. Oh sure I’m still in the game, ranting in court, going on my little hunger strikes but shit why didn’t I think of kidnapping an Israeli soldier when I had the chance????

I’ve been denying it but now I have to admit: I’ve become the comic relief of the Middle East.

Remember Scud missiles? Even the name sounds funny now. The handshake with Rummsfeld while dropping mustard gas on the Iranians? – Classic. Being compared to Hitler? That bit was meant for me. Now everyone is Hitler! Bush, Ahmadinejad, Olmert, al-Assad, Simon Cowell, your brother in-law, Mariah Carey… Hitler. Everyone is Hitler.

I can’t believe this. I think people are actually nostalgic for me now. The soundtrack to my life has now officially become the theme song from Benny Hill. Do you think this is funny? Do you?!#%$@*! Well then… Buy The Book HERE >>


Thursday, July 06, 2006


Today news of Ken Lay’s heart attack and unexpected death has reached me. I did not know this Mr. KennyBoy Lay person but he seemed to be a good man and like me he knew how to treat people and make money from oil and energy markets. Damn I miss manipulating the price of crude. I have been thinking that many times well known people who are connected by celebrity and a random fact seem to die in groups of three.

This is not good.